The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
this boner is exhausting
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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