i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize