i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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