I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
