would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
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i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
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GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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