direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
