I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Walk of Shame today included voting.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
