his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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