thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
vagina is talking i cant
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
