Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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