AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
