Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
