if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
