I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Enjoy the penises
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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