I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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