I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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