so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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