what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
if only i could text you this smell
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
