I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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