gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
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