you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
