I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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