my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
