new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
