Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
