just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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