Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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