My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
