: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
This baby is an asshole
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
