honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
