LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Randomize
