I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
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Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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