Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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