I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize