well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Are my feet made of real feet?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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