I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Randomize