yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
