I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
