I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
my poor anus
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
