Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
