Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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