My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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