I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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