I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
