Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
