Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize