the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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