you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Randomize
