she was so not down for the gang bang
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
