It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
