so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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